My dear daughter,
Enough already! Due date is still 5 weeks away and I am not letting you out until you are fully ready for the world. So, stop pushing my pelvic floor with your head and listen to what mommy has got to say. Assuming you are a little princess till you come out and prove me otherwise as another naughty prince, let me address you with a feminine pronoun. ‘It’ is for things. ‘She’ is for a baby girl. ‘She’ is for you and you are for me.
First things first, a little intro won’t hurt. Your dad and I had dreams, lots of them. Before we could prepare or get started on them, your brother came to us as an accidental surprise, changing our lives over. With just months into matrimony, it took us awhile to wipe our doubts and anxieties, dive fully into baby bliss and enjoy parenthood. But once there, your brother took lead and guided us step by step, making our lives better all the way, like a true destiny baby that we called him to be. Now, it was him who started asking for you when we thought we’ll be happy with just one boy and you have no idea how pestering your brother can get. He sow the baby sister dreams in our heads and your dad sow your seed in me.
Ever since I got you inside my tummy, I’ve been writing posts after posts on pregnancy and babies, making the world believe that I have no other occupation. True in a sense as I am fully preoccupied with thoughts about you. Your dad and I still have dreams that we had put on hold long ago but we want to pursue them only after you join us as a part of our family. We have re-ordered our priorities and trust me; there you are right on top of our list. We planned for you perfectly and you adhered to it properly, making me happy for passing on my planning genes to you. If your unplanned destiny brother can bring so much happiness into our lives, won’t it all double and triple with your arrival that we so much look forward to?
True that your brother has a head-start over you by nearly 3 years and half, but you, my dear, have one more soul, him, to love you and want you as much as us, your parents. That way, you have a better edge over him, don’t you? I am sure you hear him cooing to you all the time that I sometimes wonder whether you’ll recognize his voice more than mine when you are out into our arms. Since your brother always comes crying to me innocently when your dad scolds him, your dad now wants to pet, pamper and spoil you, his daughter girl while I play the bad cop.
Me, I am tired of all the boyish stuff that your dad and brother do. I need you for female family company, to love you as my Chinky girl, to dress you in a pink frock and a lovely bow and shower loads of kisses on your angelic chubby cheeks. We two could share girly secrets and show mocking faces to your dad and bro if ever they try to eavesdrop. My dear girl, we are all waiting for you to join us at our poker games, to balance teams in badminton and to make our family complete.
During this pregnancy with you, you have so far made sure that you tick off everything that I missed the last time around, both the good and the bad. The good as in washing away regrets and fulfilling wishes and bad as in making sure I experience every pregnancy symptom in the textbook that I escaped last time. If that’s how you want it, let me challenge you now to come out into this world by normal delivery unlike last time when I had to have an emergency C-section. Natural birth is something that I’ve been longing for and working for in the last nine months. If you are aiming to fill in the gaps from last time, this is one big blank that you have to work on. You better start on it right away.
So, there you go. These are some of the things that happened, some of the so many collective thoughts that we have for you and about you. Afraid that you might accuse me of conveniently re-constructing them again upon you arrival, I want you to know them all while you are still a part of me, while we still share this special parental and placental bonding. To make up for all the scrap books, albums and picture movies that I had made for your brother, which due to want of time, I am not sure if I will be able to repeat for you again, I broadcast this one letter on my blog, hoping for it to appease you when you are old enough to question me on partiality. If that’s still not enough, hold your dad responsible, it’s his turn now anyway.
And if after all this baby girl talk, you still come out to us as a little boy, chalo, let’s change the gender and do it all one more time 🙂