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Vodka Venture

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Orange juice with vodka is Screw-Driver. Concentrated vodka is a shot. Beer contains the least percentage of alcohol and Breezer is more of a freezer drink. Is this glossary sufficient to testify that I did sip, or what is the right word, booze alcohol? Even though for just one night, I did it! Born and brought up in Pondicherry, it is a shame that it took me this long to try my first experiment with it. Alright, before you get all judgmental, let’s start the story from scratch.

All my life, I was never able to stand the stench of alcohol whenever I happened to pass by a wine shop. Just the smell did a lot of chemical reactions right at my nostrils, sending my brain multiple instructions to throw up. I wondered how was that people not only consumed alcohol but also craved for it, got addicted to something that was so foul smelling. The blinding “high” that it gives compensates for the stench, so I’ve heard. What was that high all about?

I’ve been curious about the feeling of getting drunk that I wanted to try it once, try just once but try enough to quench my questioning. Curiosity killed the cat. So does alcohol. If death is inevitable, I might as well see what the fuss is before I succumb. I decided that I should say my first wine-glasses cheers with my husband after I get married and this decision was made five years ago.

After marriage there were other kinds of experiments to try out that alcohol slipped out of my mind the way alcohol does to other things in the mind. Then there was the new-house-busy-busy, followed by pregnancy, childbirth, sleeplessness and so on that even if I remembered, it wasn’t the right time or the right place. Longer the wait, more the curiosity. Last week, I broached the subject to Vijay. Vijay was a social drinker before marriage and thanks to me that later on I forbade him from even that. Such a request coming from me, he grabbed this opportunity to conduct an elaborate theory and practical lesson on spirits.

The lesson began last Friday night, confident that there was a weekend ahead to heal hangovers if any. Bedroom nursed my little Akhil to sound sleep while the living room was set up to stage my adventure. It was during the preparation phase that Vijay lectured me the theory of screw-driver and shots which I’ve answered in brief right at the commencement of this post. We pushed aside the center table and sat on the carpet with newspapers covering the happening area. Two wine glasses, one bottle of vodka, one bottle of beer, lemon, salt, pickle and one carton of Tropicana Orange sat on top. Corner lamp was dimmed to create the right mood and ambiance for a different kind of seduction.

Vijay assured me that unlike brandy or whiskey, vodka was distilled thrice that it doesn’t smell at all. He mixed up the drinks and was ready for cheers. I stared at it for two seconds mulling over what I was about to do and before I could mull any longer, I was like on your mark, get set, GO…CHEERS. The drink drained through my throat creating a warm fuzzy feeling but otherwise, no high, no nothing. I gave a condescending look to Vijay as if this was all his fault when he offered me the second glass. Slowly, we emptied half a bottle of vodka together while I was still waiting for the high to hit me.

Once we were done, Vijay asked me to walk up and get him some water. I tried to stand up but my feet felt so heavy that I dropped down. I supported myself on the couch and started walking towards the kitchen but my limbs were directed towards the balcony. My mind was clear, I could feel that. I could hear every word of the soap running on the TV in the background and understood every word that Vijay said. Still, it seemed like my body possessed a different mind of its own and refused to listen to my instructions. There I fell down again. I thought that high would give an illusionary feeling of staying afloat. On the other hand, I felt as if gravity had gained extra potency and was pulling me down. It was like walking on a bouncer in kid’s amusement parks. It felt like moon-walking. There, I fell down for the third time and started giggling, knowing that I was giggling like a moron but not being able to stop it.

The experience was so funny that I simply kept strolling inside my house, afraid that the high would subside if I take a break and I’d miss the moments of kicks. Vijay took the camera out to shoot the wobbling me. I tried to stop him and fell down once again, laughing and making him laugh too. That was one romantic drunken night! I said and did so many crazy things. As the night progressed, I started feeling real heavy and was to some extent scared even. Adventure experiments are fine but not worth getting addicted for. I guess alcohol causes more harm by the way of people’s social reaction to the liquid than to the physical body itself. I enforced to Vijay and enforced myself that this would be our first and last booze session and before I said or did anything stupid like vowing or swearing, I crawled into my bed and crashed for a good night baby sleep.

The next morning, Vijay woke me up and asked me how many fingers was he holding up, just to check my sanity and the extent of hangover. Thankfully, there was none at all and I woke up as fresh as any other day except for that satisfactory mischievous grin on my face. I did it!

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26 thoughts on “Vodka Venture

  1. Okay.Correction in your blog. I wasn’t a social drinker before marriage and gave up now. I was a drunkard before marriage and a social drinker now 🙂

  2. What a wonderful experience 😉 I am not aware of the fun in consuming alcohol.. but it’d be real fun to watch the person who got drunk giggle without a reason, talk non-sense most of the times, speak truth sometimes and even cry after consuming liquor. Vijay was lucky.. nenga omlette, full boil lam podala.. otherwise he would have had a great friday night in washing the room 😉 anyway a good attempt.. களவும் கற்று மற.. 🙂

  3. @Vee-Vee: Really? I think we need to take this discussion offline 🙁

    @Deva: I know…I didn’t get the opp to see any drunkard in action. But I got to see myself on video the next day 🙂 Puke panna kudaathunu plan panni, friday night very early dinner mudichutain…so empty stomach vodka saved me from puking 😀

    @Three cheers? One for Vijay and one for me…the last one? It’d take sometime for akhil to try such adventures 😀

  4. @Venkatesh, Harsha: Yeah, it was a great experience but no pics taken…Even though drunk, I succeeded in stopping Vijay from clicking snaps 🙂

    @tekybala: Hee hee…edukey adanthuta yeppdi, innum try panna nariya vishayam irukey 🙂

  5. adra sakka adra sakka… What a divine experience…. Yow Vijay nee kuduthu vachaa aaluyaaa….As usual, after marriage no wife(like archana for you ) will allow to drink. Appadiyey konjam jillinu Oru Kadhal oru scene patha mathiri irrunduchu…….. So Funny. So happy for you guys. Yow Vijay eppadiyo innoru nallu sarakku correct pannitaaa…..Archana.. The way you have explained was so good. One Question, Archana Vodka mattum thaan kuduchiya illa Vijaykaga vanchurandha Beer sethu kudichtiyaa…. (Vadaa pochey)

  6. @Lakshmipathy: Romba feel panreengaloo…poi oru bottle vodka vaangi adinga, ellam sariya poogum 🙂 Vodka mattum daan kudichain…beer taste panni paarthain, suthama pidikala…so gave it up! besides, beer ellam chinna pula saraku…yennaku only hard drinks 😉

    @Divya: That was an one time experimenting session…too late divya 🙂

  7. wow !!! this is great.. though i have tasted only red wine till now, reading your blog kindles my instinct to try on Vodka 😀 😀 .. a wonderful experience explained beautifully 🙂 🙂 kudos to you archana.. u r indeed a great blogger …

  8. Vidunga… Feelings of India thaan….Ella Kudimaga(n)(l) sollura mathiri…..Indru mudhal kudikka matten sathyam adi thangam… Bottlekitta sollitaen. Oru Naal Mudhalvar mathiri… Oru Naal Vodka kudichuthala…..appuram Moon walk nadathurukinga… athanala “Nilaviley Kudimagal” oru pattathai kudutharalam nenaikiraen…….

  9. @Anon: I sipped red wine once, just a tea spoonful. It tasted like cough syrup…so I gave it up. I don’t even recollect the taste of vodka, i just gulped it down my throat 🙂 So happy to influence people on this Vodka mission. All the best for ur trial…And thanks a lot for the compliments 🙂

    @Lakshmipathy: Neenga solrathu onnumey puriyella…but yetho nallatha daan solreenganu yeduthukittu, thanks 🙂

    @HBK: No next. Yennakum seri, Vijay kum seri. Appdiyeh next time adichalum, kandipa unna kupida maatain…neeyeh ellathayum gaali panniduva 😉

  10. Vidunga… Feelings of India thaan….

    Ella Kuddimaga(n)(l) sollura mathiri…..
    As like every Male and Female citizen Says

    Indru mudhal kudikka matten sathyam adi thangam… Bottlekitta sollitaen.
    I promise from today that i will not Drink (This is a Old Tamil Song…) .. I said this to Bottle.

    Oru Naal Mudhalvar mathiri… Oru Naal Vodka kudichuthala…..
    As like One day Chief Minister You had a drink Vodka for a day.

    appuram Moon walk nadathurukinga…
    After drinking as you had your moon Walk.

    athanala “Nilaviley Kuddimagal” oru pattathai kudutharalam nenaikiraen…….
    Because of Moon Walk i said we can give a title as “Citizen in Moon”.

    I tried something It did not work out 🙂

  11. @Subash: Adukku daan VV comments sectionla marupu therivichutaarey 🙂

    @Lakshmipathy: Hello…yennku tamil nalla theriyum…naan puriyellanu sonnathu, oru naal attemptku evlo periya pattamanu…hee hee…anyways, good attemp 🙂

  12. hehe.very well written Archana!!your blog reminded me of a trip to Goa with Infy project mates. We actually had a booze session wid few project mates (females) :). They 2 were laughing and giggling for no reasons 🙂 I still have no clue why do girls laugh after booze 😀

  13. hi…. i’m a great fan of ur archieves…. especially the way of ur narration… woooooowww…. mr.vijay is really lucky… and ur son looks sooo cute……

  14. @SASI: So sorry for a late reply. I just noticed that I hadn’t replied. Thanks for being mys blog fan and thanks from Akhil too. Lucky Vijay? I’ll make sure I tell this to him in bold letters double underlined 🙂

    Swathika: Hee hee no comments. What you think happens next time, happened to me alright 🙂

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